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day 1 still.
its day one and i still have things to say although what teenager doesn't.

I just came back from a smoke break, im now smoking 1  a day instead of the usual 4.
but it will stop soon once i get my medicine i can almost guarantee that.

right now im crying, it really suck i miss everyone in my family that is deceased,
from my great grandma to my uncle troy to me adopted grandma on my step mom's side.

I want to believe that there is a better place for them instead of 6 feet of dirt
i just wish that there was a heaven, just for them.

i felt like i could of got to know more about my great grandma, don't get me wrong i know somethings
but i feel like i could of got to know more.

i miss my adopted grandma as well, she was one of the greatest people i have every met in my life.
she influenced it as well as made it better. when she was around she was one of the only people
i could talk to and not get judged my my wrongful actions. Now that shes gone i have a limited amount
of people i can see in person to talk about my problems and get infinite amounts of love.

I just want to be the person that is always trusted and that people care about the most.
I just wonder what they would say if they saw me now.

I just want to be a better person.

im getting of here before i ruin the computer with my tears.


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